Tuesday, March 17, 2015

The Present

Like a virus the heartsting spread throughout her body. It's an interesting thing, the heart. It can ache like an injury or sting like a gash through the arm. It did not ache today. Her body came to the rescue and shut down without her consent like a computer virus. She went numb to the pain. Better than the alternative she thought. As she laid in bed, she began to think of a future she could not see clearly. The contagion had quickly infected her eyes and blinded her with fear. There was no diagnosis for heartache. She knew she could not treat the pain she felt with medicine. She remembered all the moments which once brought her happiness and shuttered as it now only brought pain. She needed something to bring light to the darkness, a nepenthe for the past.

It was time for her to heal her own heart; she needed to love herself now. There was no nepenthe. No quick fix that wouldn't just mask the pain and hide it away. You can put feelings in box and pretend it is not there but these boxes begin to breed monsters. To be strong she needed to start moving on and begin to grow without him. This virus could be cured she realized. She needed to let go of her old life, her old self, and be reborn. The pain which once infected her started transforming into passion. Like a phoenix, she could become a flame and light her world on fire once again; she became the light that conquered the darkness. 

It's an interesting thing, the heart.

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